Cynthia28's Blog

April 14, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — cynthia28 @ 11:43 pm

My guess is you have all realized I am very liberal. I used to think it was how I was raised. My parents are very liberal as were my dad’s parents. However, my mother’s parents were very conservative. So how did they produce two children that were very much liberal. I always chalked it up to not wanting to be like their parents and being smarter than their parents(which isn’t fair, as my grandparents were very smart, just not liberal.) Then, I read this study Liberals brains work differently

Turns out, there are brain differences in the brain structure of conservatives and liberals. Liberals are able to show more compassion and are more able to be flexible when plans change. We are able to see both sides of a situation and change our minds when the information presented makes more sense. Hmm. Good to know.

This song came out when I was in highschool. The line that always stuck with me is about people waiting in line for welfare and some smart ass punk say “get a job.” Most people want to work. Some are unable to. Very few don’t work just because they don’t want to.

So, to lighten up the whole thing and to make fun of us all, I scanned some cartoons from the book “Why Dogs are Better than Republicans.”

Why they are better,  Why they are the same,  Why they are better than dems.

My parents always said they would support my brothers and me in anything we wanted to do as long as it was legal, moral, and we didn’t become republicans. We only have one black sheep in our family. He is the republican, but we love him still.

What does this have to do with community psychology? Well, it seems as though the conservative forces tend to blame the victim, tend to be more ethnocentric, and tend to want to remove help to those who need it because poor people just don’t try hard enough (the whole, “it is the problem of the individual, not the system” thing). I just don’t get that kind of thinking. If we allow poor people to remain poor, with little food, we continue to produce people who are at a huge disadvantage. According to Norman Garmezy of the University of Minnesota, minorities are most likely to have less. We also know that lack of food will cause developmental delays. These delays may be perminent…Here is a link to that information. undernutrition and brain development. Do we really want to have that in one of the richest nations in the world? I don’t. Just one hungry child is one too many. Just one sick person without health insurance is one too many. It costs us so much more to plug the holes , than does prevention. Yet, when funding is cut, as we are seeing in Arizona right now, prevention services are the first to go. Then, people get layed off, as has happened with the behavioral health agencies in the state. There are all ready too few jobs. How many of these people will now need to collect unemployment? We are not prevention oriented. Too bad for us.

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April 1, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — cynthia28 @ 12:27 am

My dad is one of the most gentle souls ever. He is a big man, 6 feet 4 inches and broad in the shoulders. Yet, most people (with the exception of a highschool boyfriend) can sense his kindness. He is a social worker and does individual counseling. Many of his clients are women who have had abuse in their lives. They are not trusting of most people, let alone men, yet they are comfortable with my dad as a councilor. So, how is it I got hooked up with an abuser? I really have no idea.

There was very little yelling in the house as I grew up. I mean, my brother and I had the usual fights and sometimes my mom lost her temper with us (not that I blame her now for that. We were hell on wheels sometimes. Actually, I was hell and my brother was usually just sticking up for himself.) My parents never fought. They have disagreements, of course but fighting, yelling, and especially violence just didn’t happen in our house. We were rarely even spanked.

So, how could someone from a good family end up with an abuser? It happens all the time. Often, an abuser can appear very charming and caring to begin with. Once the victim is sucked in, the campaign to keep the victim off-balance begins. My ex showered me with presents and kindness until we signed the marriage certificate. Then, the problems began. I became a statistic.

I was luckier than most. I had a place to go when I finally left. I had the support of my community and my family. I had a good friend who gave me great advice and helped me with a safety plan. Still, it took me months to leave. My ex controled all the money, all the food, how much time I was allowed to be on the college campus, and who I talked to. The two things that pushed me to leave were the fact that I was pregnant and I did not want my unborn baby hurt, and he threatened to take my dogs (how had been with me for 6 years), and dump them in the desert. The night I left (actually, he kicked me and the dogs out, but refused to give me any keys to the cars), I got so mad I kicked in the door. I am 6 inches taller and 25 years younger than my ex. Yet, he scared me. I was right to be scared. He made good on the threat against the dogs.

Now, for some facts and stats. There are a few major reasons women don’t leave. Check out this article Why Don’t They Leave.  Society still blames the victim. Women are still a minority, so there are fewer resources available to help women and empower them to leave. There is always the threat to children, pets, and extended family that are all too often carried out. There are even fewer resources for women with pets. Most DV shelters do not allow animals, mostly due to licensing issues. Read about the numbers in this article pets sometimes keep them in the situation. This is changing, and there are ways to help women with pets. Some DV shelters are teaming up with local humane societies and other animal rescue organizations. The organizations will take the animal into the shelter or foster home for no charge and return the animal when the victim is set in a new situation. This gives them more resources and maybe empower them to leave.Border Animal Rescue, with whom I volunteer, is set up to help in this area. Here are some great videos about two DV shelters specifically for women with pets.

There are few statistics about extended family injuries and death, because then get counted under different stats. However, these deaths do occur. I am hoping to get that information soon. Maybe that will be my next blog. And, I will talk about how it affects kids.

Some other information about DV: (Interesting. The wheels look very much like the Ecological Perspective wheel. Again, the outer circle keeping the individual oppressed.)

 information on domestic violence. 

What it should be!

What it is:

Power and Control wheel.   Community Accountibility Wheel.   Imigrant and refugee power and control wheel.   GLBT Power and Control wheel.  Medical wheel

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